V1

I wrote some lines
about a cola in disguise
who couldn't get drunk if he tried
in glasses

My friends said that
the words simply weren't up to scratch
leaving readers feeling so detached
they trash it

Bet I didn't buy it; the truth would prevail
so I sent it through the U.S. Mail
where a company evaluated me
and surely'd publish it if I paid'em


CHORUS

Sayin' "You've got a gift"
"You've got a gift" with purchase
(There's nothing you can't do when Benjamin's with you)
"You've got a gift"
"You've got a gift" with purchase
(You might write but money talks far louder in reviews)


V2

They pressed my poem
as well as hundreds not my own
All the commercialism shown:
so blatant.

It wasn't long
until I changed it to a song
then sent the demo tape along
to agents.

A rep called me back to say it killed
his eardrums and sent me a bill
But if i credit him a grand or two
he pledged to be the perfect shill


CHORUS

Sayin' "You've got a gift"
"You've got a gift" with purchase
(We'll keep on bouncing until your check does)
"You've got a gift"
"You've got a gift" with purchase
(We'll still be your groupies long as you pay us our rupies)


OUTRO

Whether monophonic sound or overused chords
Your currency buys off remorse
For thirty bucks they'll say I'm smooth
That's heaps preferred to hearing the truth