I once had a dragon
I hatched him from an egg
I stole'em from his mom when she was humping on my leg
I know you think it's funny
On that we can agree
I've never met a dragon with a kink for my left knee

I met her in a mountain home, lost inside her cave
I never thought I'd wind up as a dragon's nookie slave
I don't know she managed to get herself knocked up
But I love my baby dragon, he's way better than a pup

Dragon ho, dragon hey!
Here comes my dragon, he likes to run and play!
Dragon hey, dragon ho!
Here comes my dragon, my goofy so-and-so!

If you've never nursed a dragon, let me say that it can hurt
His teeth are really sharp and there's burns on all my shirts
Cleaning up his vomit was not a favorite of mine
But speaking as a proud papa, you know his poop did shine!

I named the kid Jurassis
It was a joke of mine
If you say the full name then you'll get the joke in time (ding!)
My neighbors are so friendly now they're always saying hi
Or maybe they just heard about his taste for people pie

Dragon ho, dragon hey!
Here comes my dragon, he likes to run and play!
Dragon hey, dragon ho!
Here comes my dragon, my goofy so-and-so!

Dragon dragon drago hoooo!
Dragon dragon drago hoooo!

One cold and lonely morning, my dragon ran away
Why he'd left or where he'd gone, I really couldn't say
I gave him what he wanted, I cooked and cleaned and such
But other than his friendship, he couldn't ask for much

The house is big and empty with my little dragon gone
All that's left are scorch marks where we played upon the lawn
I once had a dragon
A good friend through and through
But that he's been gone so long I don't know what to do

Dragon ho, dragon hey!
Where is my dragon, why did he go away?
Dragon hey, dragon ho!
Where is my dragon? I never felt so low

I was moping 'round the house when he showed up with his bride
Not only was I happy, I was swelled up with such pride
My little boy Jurassis had found himself a girl
A striking figure of a dame with her wings unfurled

I cooked a big ol' dinner table
Settings were for three
Jurassis, and his wife, and a spot of course for me

As we laughed and ate, I saw her giving me the eye
I've got a funny hunch she wants to give my knee a try

Now friends, let me tell you, should you wind up in my shoes
It's safer not to run
You should wait until she's through.